Monday, January 7, 2008

Choose or lose

So here's my big dilemma:

Every single morning (but especially on Mondays) I drag myself mournfully out of bed, and while I'm dejectedly brushing my teeth and deciding whether I'm going to wear my uncomfortable but badass professional shoes or my scruffy but blissfully pain-free flats, I think: I can't do this next year, I don't want to do this next year, I need to have a different job next year, I hope I'm not a teacher next year.

And then most afternoons, as I'm heading away from school toward the gym and Duane Reade (I swear I spend the bulk of my non-teaching time in a Duane Reade), a teeny tiny Vivian Paley-esque spark glimmers within me and I think: Well...maybe. Maybe.

I know that it's perfectly natural to feel dread at the beginning of the school day and relief at the end, but which will be the stronger pull for me? Should I heed the advice in this commercial (with which I strongly identify, by the way), or should I take heart in the message of this Teach NYC ad (with which I take exception; obviously New York's other influential role models wear Mets uniforms, not Yankee uniforms).

In other news, tomorrow is Day 1 of the dreaded ELA exam, and hmm, what's that I smell cooking in the air? Could that possibly be the smell of...doom?! I'll be proctoring, so it looks like I get to find out!


X said...

Don't make any decisions about your future right before the exam. That's what I keep telling myself, anyway.

Anonymous said...

Hee! Well, I primarily service kindergarten, first and second grade, so I'm not as caught up in exam fever as the older grades. Which is one thing I have to be thankful for!

Anonymous said...

Do not despair. I've been teaching for seven years and I feel that I'm getting the hang of it - it's a hard job, every day is different, every kid is need some time to develop some routines. :-)